Father's Day, a leetle bit late

Originally I thought that Father's Day would be perfect, it was the 14th, we'd all be together up in Colorado, but alas, I was way off. Turns out it was the 21st and Ben was back here in AZ alone. So we celebrated on our own when the kids and I got back home on the 28th. I feel bad about this for several reasons, so this post will hopefully make up for it. First, I didn't get Ben an anniversary card. Second, I didn't get him a Father's Day card. Third, we weren't even there with him. Fourth, I've been in a crap funk for the last month (at least), and I probably have been a crappy companion and housewife. So, if you're not up for reading some schloopy reasons about why I think Ben is so awesome, then go ahead and skim through, neither of us will be offended. I ususally try and make light of things, since humor and sarcasm in writing is how I make myself not feel as lame, but this'll be completely serious because I think he deserves it. So gear up for some goopy love, or skip it.

I made Ben a photo board thing to take to work with pics of the kiddos, since they are oh-so-cute.A friend of mine taught RS the week I was home in Abq, and said something that clicked with me, and put into words how I feel about Ben. I don't know their whole story, but her husband was a convert, and she said that she is sure they knew each other up in heaven and he told her to come and find him on Earth so that they could be together. First off, that's so cute. Second though, how true is that? I feel truly grateful that I have Ben. We had a rough beginning (ok, a rough 2 year beginning), and I know of several people (myself included) who wondered what in the heck I was doing sticking around him. He even told me on several occasions he was not companion material, nor did he want to be at the time. Naturally I put up defenses and tried to move on, but I failed. You can look at this one of two ways-I'm either the most desperate person alive, or I had knowledge that Ben was choosing to ignore at the time. I obviously prefer the latter! Looking back, I am 100% ok with how our "story" went. I know now what Ben knew at the time, and that's that we would have for sure gotten divorced if we'd gotten married when we first started dating. Ben could've handled it a little more gracefully than he did, but he brushed me off and dated a million girls for noble reasons. We did continue to date on and off, and he was always one of my closest friends- but I am glad that it was Ben who wanted to start things again, and I didn't have to sick-puppy-dog it back to him :) At the risk of not sounding arrogant, I am unexpressibly grateful that I gave Ben a 47th chance and we got married. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am meant for him and he is meant for me. The trials that we've been through together as a couple and now as a family, would not have happy endings were we to suffer through them with different people. I am the one for Ben, and he is the one for me. My children are my perfect little angels from heaven, and they are here because of him. Ben is the fount of all good in our house, he is our provider, he is our strength. Someday, when they are older, Kyndal and Devin will realize just how great of a father they have and I hope they will hold that fact dear to them. He is attentive and loving, caring and the most fun dad ever. When they grow up, the example he'll have given them for a father is one that continually worked hard for his family, was always active and never lazy, and (though you might never know it) loves deeply. We are blessed, I am blessed, to have Ben be ours.