El Grosso

I know I'm going overboard on posts, but I just had to share this one today. First, here is a poem I've seen several times in the past couple of years. Every time I read it my heart seizes up. But I never truly appreciated it until roughly an hour ago:
Before I Was A Mom
Before I was a Mom I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.
Before I was a Mom - I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a Mom I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom - I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom - I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

Kyndal has had a "buggah" nose for like two weeks now and it's pretty routine. She's a champ at blowing her nose, so it's not so bad. But today we were leaving lunch with Ben and she was in desperate need of a kleenex. We're on our way out to the car, and she sneezes. EWW. Then, before Ben can get me a kleenex out of the car, what does she do? Oh yeah, rubs HER NOSE ALL OVER MY SHIRT!! And while I'm screaming and Ben is laughing his butt off, she BLOWS HER NOSE ON MY SHIRT. I have never been more grossed out. Not when her poop diap falls on the floor, or when she says "poop" and shows me where before I can wipe it off. Not when she barfed hugely all over me and the door into the house. I couldn't think, move, or function for a good 2.3 minutes. I actually wanted to rip my shirt off right in the middle of the parking lot. I'm not talking little bits of snot, it was like SNOT everywhere on my shirt. So gross. Before I was a Mom, I'd never had my shirt used as a kleenex in such a literal fashion.